Monday, June 20, 2011

Tribute to Two Fathers

Charlie (my dad)
My dad is one of the most interesting and inspiring people I know. He has changed so much over the years that I almost grew up with two different fathers.

When I was little, our nickname for him was "Grumpy" after the dwarf in Snow White. He was conservative and strict. I always saw him like a big teddy bear though, with a softness in the middle of his rough exterior.

Over the years, many tough life circumstances have changed him. Well, not so much changed him, but have let that soft interior be what he shows to the world now.

If anything, Dad has taught me to change with the tide. Nothing is permanent, and we can adapt to what is happening, if we can let go of trying to control and fix everything.

He also taught me to love and care for my family, and that he loves my Mom more than anything. He always attributes his success in life to my Mom who is brilliant, intelligent, and supported him.

I attribute his success also to his ability to change his opinion as he learns more about the world, and his deep spiritual grounding in a belief that change is part of life, and life is good.

I look up to Dad, so it is no surprise that I married someone so much like my father that they even have the same birthday.

Jeff (my husband)
My husband is just as calm and grounded as my Dad. He also fiercely loves his family and had a rough exterior when I first met him.

Jeff is an amazing father, always there for our son and he has an immense amount of patience. He never withholds emotion from Jeffrey so he always knows he is loved. He respects Jeffrey and wants him to be none other then himself.

Jeff loves life and easily adapts to change. He is the smartest person I know and always loves to share his knowledge with others so they can succeed.

Charlie & Jeff
In a sermon for Father's Day yesterday, the speaker mentioned a quote that said the best gift a father can give to his children is to love their mother. My Dad had never heard this quote before, but he sure lived out that gift. I never remember a time when Dad was not telling me how much he loves Mom. Now, as her caregiver, he says his greatest honor in life is to care for Mom. I see every day how much he loves her in how he dresses her, laughs with her, and always advocates for her.

Jeff is the same way. He too gives our son the gift of loving me, no matter what. It is no easy, fun, or pleasant thing to take care of a wife with bipolar disorder, but he has worked for many years to be more understanding and caring.

Jeff and Dad are the main caregivers in our home, and are the best role models for my son Jeffrey. Every day Jeffrey sees two strong, caring, loving men take care of their families with joy, yet also stay true to who they are as individuals. That is a difficult balancing act.

Thank you Dad and Jeff for being the best role model and friend I have as a daughter and wife, and our son has as a son and grandson.


  1. Thanks for the wonderful Father's day gift, from a loving, compassionate Daughter, who is clearly dedicated to careing for both her parents and her family.

    Love PAPA

  2. Thanks Dad! I learned from the best :-)