Friday, September 30, 2011


The other day after breakfast as I was running around trying to get ready for the day, I heard my husband Jeff ask Mom if he could help her put on her shoes. This was odd because usually Dad and I help Mom get dressed and she was already dressed and wearing shoes. Mom said yes, and added that she had a bit of trouble with her shoes this morning. My husband casually said "I noticed you have two different shoes on so I thought I could help you with that."

For some reason, this struck me as a such a special and compassionate moment. The way Jeff asked Mom about her shoes was so kind. He did not point out that she had two different shoes on or make a big deal about anything, he just offered to help her. I also think it is sweet that he even noticed her shoes because Dad and I were in such a hurry that morning I fear we could have let Mom leave the house with one black shoe and one white shoe.

I know technically it does not really matter if someone is wearing two different shoes, but it would have mattered to Mom. Jeff allowed her to leave the house looking her usual pretty and put together self, and that was a very special gift.
Mom, Jeffrey, & Jeff making cookies together.

Sometimes it is the little things we do, the ways in which we make sure our loved one maintains the life and dignity they want and deserve, which make the biggest difference.


Rev. Katie

1 comment:

  1. After my grandfather was diagnosed with Alzheimer's he'd often forget that he was no longer allowed to drive. Instead of getting in arguments with him my cousins and I somehow pounced upon the idea of "asking if we could please drive." Somehow he took this as "helping us learn to drive" and it didn't upset him. Never mind that, while the youngest was 17, the oldest was in his late twenties, married, with a kid of his own. At 19 I had already had my license for 3 years and been driving the freeways of California. But it worked. Between seven of us we were always able to have somebody with him whether we were working on college papers, doing some kind of "work from home" situation, or just hanging out and using the internet.